The Regency Hotel

The Regency used to be the city's premier hotel. Interesting how reality compares to the hotel literature of pre-pandemic times:

Indulge Yourself!

The Regency is committed to delivering its guests an unrivaled dimension of bespoke service with unmatched attention to detail and extraordinary amenities. "He thinks he can convert these alternators into miniature windmills so we’ll have electricity." An impeccable staff prides itself in exceeding expectations. Dinner was brought to them in their room—an odd meal of questionable meat that Leila wouldn’t touch and some hard flat things that looked like fried leftover oatmeal.

Set in the heart of the business and entertainment districts, our world-class downtown hotel is the ideal starting point for exploring all this vibrant city has to offer. "So is the whole city like this? Just a bunch of tribes squabbling over who gets to eat the cats and whose fault everything is?" Walk to events at the convention center or one of the city’s many parks and stores. Cassie squinted at the shop ahead, its bare canopy frame hung with colorful streamers, chains of broken glass that clattered in the breeze, and a sign that said, “May’s Creations.” Dine at one of the city’s renowned restaurants or enjoy a show in the Theater District. "We finally came upon some Thespians who helped us get back home, but not before taking us to the theater and insisting we tell the whole story of the twins, which they then reenacted for us. Weirdoes." You’ll be minutes away from museums, zoo, medical center, and other points of interest. "Supposedly there’s a Zoo Tribe that lives there. They use the animals for food when they die, or kill them outright if they don’t die fast enough."

Expect an unforgettable experience every time you walk through our doors.

Features and Accomodations

The Regency offers a world of customized comfort with your needs in mind. On the way out, they were each given a flashlight with their room number on it and a mark indicating the date the battery had been replaced. Each flashlight had to be returned at breakfast if the owner wanted to eat. It's a place for the seasoned traveler who expects something more. "I can’t believe I’m on honeybucket duty tomorrow." You will be pampered from the moment of your arrival through the front entrance of brass and beveled glass. The glass was broken out of the doors and front windows, and crude attempts had been made to patch the gaps with signs, plywood, and heavy curtains. The welcoming lobby is tastefully appointed with large bouquets of fresh-cut flowers, opening up to the dramatic mezzanine level that overlooks it. The goat brayed and kicked in its pen behind the concierge desk, and in the stifling air its smell made the lobby stink of goat.

As a member of Preferred Hotels & Resorts, we add substance to style, with a variety of amenities and services, including more than 300 handsomely appointed rooms and suites that evoke a feeling of comfort and convenience, combining traditional European decor and charm with high-tech amenities tailored to the traveler's needs. "Lots of natural light in here, even if it is kind of stuffy. Someone will be up soon with food, water and a lantern."

The Regency offers both casual and formal dining, including the nationally recognized Regency Bistro, where our executive chef presents a seasonal menu that continues our commitment to local, fresh ingredients of the highest quality. Cassie poked the strange-looking blob on her plate, concluding it was Spaghetti-O’s mixed with whatever else could be poured out of a can. Sophisticated and intimate, the Bistro allows for highly attentive personal service. "Wasteful to not show up when they’ve gone to the trouble to make food available. You can have an extra half-scoop of noodles. But no extra cookies."

Open daily for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Reservations recommended.


Susan Helene Gottfried said...

I love the juxtapositioning going on here. Nicely done!

Alice Audrey said...

Susan said it. Though if you haven't read the book that line about May's Creations isn't going to have nearly the impact.